A Preemie Grows Up: Starting Preschool

Hello again. You may find my posts very sporadic for a few months yet. I'm finishing up a degree program, and then have plans to prepare for an intense professional certification. I'm still passionate about Mommypeace blog, and sharing my preemie parent experience.


School started back for us three weeks ago. As we embarked on our journey into first grade and it's joys and tribulations, I found myself reflecting on the very first time my son attended preschool. At 6, this will be his fourth year of school outside our home.

Backstory

Our son was a 30 weeker. He was born smack dab in the middle of RSV season and the major winter weather month where we lived. After his weeks in the NICU, we had originally thought going home meant family gatherings, church, shopping and introducing our kid to the world, our world.

NOPE. Our final few days in the NICU consisted of first aid and CPR videos, more training on baths, how to feed and deal with reflux, car seat tests, and the Synagis shot as well as a fact sheet on RSV and a fun video about handwashing and avoiding sick people. Then our pediatrician warned us on his first visit a few days later that it was an especially bad RSV season in our area. He didn't lift his recommendation on RSV season isolation until late June that year.

After two seasons of RSV isolation, we received the go-ahead from our pediatrician to try two day a week preschool. I was working some school hours in around his Early Intervention therapy schedule. This was nice for me since I was still working about 20 hours a week from home or in the office if grandma was available to babysit.

School Selection

We went on the tour. We paid a deposit on a very nice, very clean private preschool where we were personal family friends of the Assistant Director and our son started in the toddler class at 24 months.


Even though I knew the ladies at this school and trusted them implicitly, I still asked around. I checked with his pediatrician. I asked at NICU follow up clinic. I had a long chat with both his PT and OT in Early Intervention and learned that they loved that school and frequently saw other children there.

For tools to combat your own worry and possible separation anxiety, most preschools in our area offered a daily report on your child's day. In addition, the teacher was just a phone call or text away if you wanted an update on how the transition to big school kid is going. Our preschool, sent a daily report that listed:

• The date
• Class activities, such as art and what books were read
• The meals and snacks served and whether the portion was merely tried, not touched or eaten
• Diaper changes and the type and time of change
• Any concerns, accomplishments or behavior that needed to be addressed

Germ Exposure

Once we are able to leave the NICU, we are taught to armor up and avoid PEOPLE and GERMS at all costs. Taking my son to a place with 8 other toddlers made my anxiety flag wave as if it was in a tornado and a hurricane.

The child went 1 day, and then had his first stomach virus and stayed home for the next week. Then he went for 6 more days, and had a bad cold and ear infection.

Between preemie immune systems and isolation from germs, your kid is going to be sick at first. A LOT. It is disappointing, it is scary. But, you are a preemie parent and you totally have this. It will get better! It will still happen every year. Just trust those preemie parent instincts and keep the doctor on speed dial.

Teacher Communication

Key aspects of parent-teacher communication:

• Always let the teacher know the health challenges or therapy needs of your child.
• A "cheat sheet" with medicines, allergies, IEP, therapy strategies, calming techniques, likes/dislikes comes in handy at the start of any program/class.
• I've never had an educator tell me I was communicating too much with them.
• Communications can be in the form of a note from you, email, or text. Ask the teacher what medium is his or her preferred way to communicate. 

Letting Our Preemies Grow...Up

I know letting our kids out of the safe, home universe we build for them is hard for all parents. I also know it is especially hard for NICU and special needs parents. I think it is because we have already had to leave them in the care of strangers, and we often have more than just the usual worries.

However, I've found that allowing my son these experiences in preschool, pre-K, and then school have allowed the growth I once feared would never be possible. Our tiny babies grow up and venture out into the world, and then prematurity or other needs are only a part of their story.

How was your child's first day of school?